Yea, this is another sweet edition of Akpors Jokes. Read and forget your sorrow.

1.Akpors and his Teacher

Teacher: Whoever answer my next question correctly can go home.

Upon hearing this, Akpos threw his bag outside through the window.

Teacher: Who threw the bag?

Akpos: Me, can I go home now?




2.A trip to Italy

A Ekaitte (akpor’s wife) goes to Italy to attend a 2-week, company training session.

… Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

Ekaittes : ‘Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?’

Akpors: laughs and says: ‘An Italian girl!!!’
The wife kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: ‘So, honey, how was the trip?’
‘Very good, thank you.’ ‘And, what happened to my present?’

‘Which present?’ She asked.
‘The one I asked for – an Italian girl!!’
‘Oh, that’ she said ‘Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait for 9 months to see if it
is a girl !!!’



3. Extra-Akpos the Inspector

A woman reporting to the police: Sir, my husband went to by potatoes 5 days ago and he is not back up to now.
inspector Akpos: why not cook something else abi,or is it only potatoes you like to eat.


4.Akpos and the White man

Black man Akpos and a white
man were seated on plane.

Akpos had a bunch of banana, while the
white man had a monkey.

Akpos wanted to go to the toilet, so he
said to the white man “Please watch over
my bananas, while I’m gone”.

He went, came back and found out that the
bananas were all gone. The white man
pointed at the monkey and said, ”your
brother the monkey ate all of them”.

Akpos smiled and said nothing. Minutes
later, the white man said, “Please hold my
monkey while I pee”.

He came back and met the monkey dead.

He asked Akpos what happened and he
replied, “This is a family matter, please stay
out of it!”




5.Barrister Akpors and the Village Farmer
Barrister Akpors who’s gone to the village for Xmas celebration went hunting in a nearby village.

He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence.

As Barrister Akpors climbed over the fence, an elderly gentleman asked him what he was doing.

He responded,

“I shot a duck and it fell in this field, I’m going in to retrieve it.”

The old farmer replied,

“This is my property, and you are not coming over here.”

Arrogant Akpors said,

“I am one of the best trial attorneys in this country, and, if you don’t let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything!”

The old farmer smiled and said,

“Apparently, you don’t know how we do things here. We settle small disagreements like this with the Three-Kick Rule.”

Barrister Akpors asked,

“What is the three-Kick Rule?”

The Farmer replied,

“Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up.”

Barrister Akpors quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old farmer.

He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly walked up to him.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into Akpor’s groin and dropped him to his knees.

His second kick nearly wiped Akpors’ nose off his face.

Barrister Akpors was flat on his belly when the farmer’s third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

He eventually summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said,

“Okay, you old farmer, now it’s my turn.”

The farmer smiled and said,

“Now, I give up. You can have the duck.”


Read Also: LMAO!!! Read These Funniest Akpors Stories and Forget Your Name (Part 1)

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In his footballing days, Taribo was truly fearsome, an attacker’s nightmare. He had the crunchy tackles and would kick you on and off the ball, and force you into intimidation with his looks, gestures and power.

Today, he is a far cry from that personality. What you have now is the born again Taribo West; the pastor and founder of Shelter in The Storm Miracle Ministries of All Nations.

“I spend most of my time at home meditating. All I want to do is to keep spreading the gospel. In my own little way, I have been into evangelisation visiting places like Ughelli and within the Orile community, Ajegunle and so on. God has been kind during these visits to preach the gospel to people who are yet to receive Christ. We believe He will take us globally very soon,” Taribo said.

What is the difference between life in Christ and one filled with charms?

“You can’t compare,” he said. “When I was living that ignorant life, I was in darkness. In the darkness, the devil can give you what God can also give you, but he will give you without joy and peace. Eventually, you will end up in sorrow. But when you experience the joy of Christ, it adds no sorrow.

“The joy of the Lord is not only my strength; it gives me everything I need in life. The love of Christ comes with freedom, success, favour, expansion and a better life. When you have all these, you have everlasting peace. That is why I am comfortable today and I’m happy how God has seen me thus far.”

But being a pastor doesn’t mean he is free from temptations. In fact he realises that there are even tougher battles to fight as a cleric.

“Temptation is permanent; it’s there every hour, every day but if you begin to study the Bible, there are principles that God has laid down for us. If you follow this, the devil will not keep you.

“From my house to the bus stop, I may see a young girl not properly brought up, dressed half- naked walking on the streets. You will see temptation right there. But you have to pray for God’s grace to overcome the temptation.”

After a career that has seen him play football in Nigeria, France, Italy, England, Germany, Yugoslavia, UAE and Iran, Taribo has seen it all and aptly names his church a shelter.

He added, “We told ourselves to fast and ask God for a name for the ministry. In the process, a sister came up and said a voice told her that we should call the ministry Shelter in The Storm Miracle Ministries. That’s how we got the name.

“During my journeys, God created a shelter for me and transferred me into that fold. There are lots of natural disasters everywhere in the world in these last days. There are crisis in Asia; there is terrorism and sectarian groups springing up. People are migrating from all over the world to Europe because of fear. In the midst of all these, God has created for everyone a shelter, where everything in your life will be restored again.”

Even though he is no longer actively involved in the game, which gave him the good life and saw him resident in some of the world’s biggest cities, the Super Eagles — with whom he played two World Cups and two Africa Cup of Nations — is still very dear to Pastor Taribo West.

“We need to pray for the team and I have taken it as an assignment to pray for the team. The national team is part of my body, it’s my family.”